Goat Simulator Review

Title: Goat Simulator
Developer and Publisher: Coffee Stain Studios
Platform(s): PC (reviewed)
Genre: Simulation
Price: $10 (Steam)

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Goat Simulator.

Naming this game as GO(A)TY certainly wouldn’t be amiss. What started off as a joke for a game jam, ended up being the Must-Have PC Exclusive, thanks to the feverish demands of gamers that loved the two joke videos that comprised the game’s ‘reveal’. Oh, and with it you can shut up console gamers every time they mention GTAV. MEEEEEH!

Joining us for this review only is our resident Goat Expert who also happens to be a Goat, Mr GOTY.
BAAA.

He says Hi. I’ll be translating his review for your reading pleasure.

BLEEEEEH. BAAA BAAA MEH BAAA BLEH.

Goat Simulator is a parody of the various Simulator games out there. It is a Sandbox game which starts off quite innocently with you controlling a goat in a garden. The game has a task list for you to try and keep you engaged, that you can do in any order. You could also end up succeeding at multiple tasks at once. Most of the tasks have a Basic, Normal and an Advanced Level which are progressively difficult. However, the game resets your progress towards achieving a task every time you quit and start a new game.

BAAAAAAAAAAAA BA BAA BABABABA BAAAA MEH.

Goat Simulator looks quite gorgeous, but is proudly not optimised to run on all gpus. The bugginess of the game is part of the joke with the developers refusing to fix it. In fact, there’s an achievement for crashing the game. There are a limited number of models which have been repeated quite a bit in the relatively small sandbox world. But then again, one must remember this was a prototype that got released due to public demand.

MEH. BAA. BA. BAAAA BAAAAAAAAABA BAABABABABLEEH.

Goat Simulator is powered by a good physics engine that can also utilise PhysX on NVIDIA gpus. Your goat has a ragdoll mode which allows it to jump much higher and also helps to get some of the achievements. The goat’s primary attack is to head-butt any interactive object in the game. Its secondary attack is to lick those objects and carry them around with an impossibly elastic tongue. The goat can perform stunts like spinning around while flying through the air and attempt to land perfectly on its bouncy feet. The goat will also spout out variations of BAA when you hit a certain key, because it’s a goat. The strangest thing in the game is the way the goat climbs ladders. It makes for quite a funny sight.

BAH BLEEEEEH BAAA BABABABA BAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Goat Simulator has multiple challenge and activity areas including an arena to fight other goats. There are also some puzzles and Easter Eggs, including a building housing the Developers, Coffee Stain Studios. There is also a minigame of Flappy Goat which is just as hard as its inspiration. You can unlock various different Goats and Powers by completing these challenges or finding the Easter Eggs. You also get score boosters for performing certain antics. There’s also a Time trial to compete for maximum destruction with your friends. You also have a bunch of collectible Goat trophies scattered all over the place but the game does not show you how many you have actually collected, till you’ve collected them all.

BABABABABAAAABLEH MEHMEHMEEEEEH BA BA.

The game is in development with Steam workshop support for mods and a promised Multiplayer mode. The possibilities for having fun in this game are just limited to your imagination and appetite for all round destruction. It’s not a game to be taken very seriously and celebrates its eccentricities to the fullest. It’s quite a welcome change from the repetitiveness of annual franchises that seems to be the game industry’s current fascination. And like any sandbox, the game only ends when you decide to quit.

Mr GOTY wants everyone to buy Goat Simulator both on Steam and as the Boxed copy when Deep Silver publishes it, but he’s a goat, what would he know about Gameeee-ow! Bad Goat BAAAAAAAAD Goat!